codeoracle: (Default)
Sakura Futaba ([personal profile] codeoracle) wrote2017-05-07 08:14 pm
Entry tags:

IC Contact



TEXT | VOICE | VIDEO | ACTION
lempereur: (let us form a contract)

[personal profile] lempereur 2017-08-11 07:37 pm (UTC)(link)
[ This isn't even what he meant. It was about the Constellation, how his own pathetic need for purpose (because torture and arms dealing were really carrying on the Phantom Thieves mission) and validation (because sticking to Adachi seemed so important back then - why?) had put them all at risk. But it's a lot easier to break something than it is to fix it, he can't just ask nicely to be let out and expect it to work, and he wouldn't, as much as Akira hates his infiltration plot as a means to get rid of them, he hasn't come up with anything better. It had been short-sighted, of course it had, but selfish? There is nothing selfish about wanting to keep the circle small. There is nothing selfish about not tripping over himself to forgive someone who has made no effort to prove he has changed, not that Yusuke is aware of.

But of course she isn't focused on that. How could she be? He is realizing quickly that he's had this conversation before, blown someone right over and not known until it was far too late to be fixed. Last time was so angry, on both sides, and Yusuke would rather be hit with a new round of venom than what he gets, which is just...hurt. Palpable, visible hurt, even through text, he can see her face twisted with pain in his head as if in a frame, and he has to put the phone down for a second.

Akira is right. Brendan was right. This is his fault, and he deserves this. ]


I still need you. I still need both of you, but I have done nothing but cause you trouble since you arrived. I don't deserve anything from you.

I'm sorry.

I know that isn't enough.

If you don't want to talk to me either, I understand.

I made my bed. I will lie in it.
lempereur: (my heart's been troubled)

[personal profile] lempereur 2017-08-11 08:21 pm (UTC)(link)
that's not what Akira said
lempereur: (Public art)

[personal profile] lempereur 2017-08-11 09:09 pm (UTC)(link)
I know you're not.

I know we are.

You might want to consult him on that. I am merely the muscle, obviously not intelligent or capable enough to choose my own relationships. I'll have to wait on his wise judgement to decide that for me.
lempereur: (Sick because I don't eat)

[personal profile] lempereur 2017-08-11 10:03 pm (UTC)(link)
You may want to wait. He was angry. Let him cool off, so I don't have to make him.

I hope so.
lempereur: (the mask is heavy)

[personal profile] lempereur 2017-08-11 10:09 pm (UTC)(link)
I will see you tomorrow.
lempereur: (It was fun while it lasted)

action;

[personal profile] lempereur 2017-08-13 05:46 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Sometime after...talking to Otabek? I Guess? What are timelines??

Futaba will get a knock on her door. Unannounced, but not unexpected. ]
lempereur: (Just waking up)

[personal profile] lempereur 2017-08-13 07:40 pm (UTC)(link)
[ It's a normal routine by now. Nod politely, come inside, take off his shoes, vomit his secrets and feelings until they cover every surface. No end in sight. ]

How are you feeling?
lempereur: (sad boi)

[personal profile] lempereur 2017-08-14 12:40 am (UTC)(link)
I'm...

[ Nope. Yusuke has to clench his teeth to cut himself off from the default response he's been using for years. I'm fine. It's a lie. It's hiding from the truth, something he made a vow to stop, and now he's doing it again. It has to end.

It's easier with Futaba, though. She at least understands. ]


I am not at my best. I am angry, and hurt, but I got some sleep, for once. I want to make things right, with everyone. I can't talk to Akira yet, so I am starting with you.
lempereur: (gonna get ya)

[personal profile] lempereur 2017-08-14 11:15 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Maybe, technically, he started with Otabek? Not that he'd done anything to hurt him, but he should have told him everything before agreeing to date him. There's a lot of things he should have done, and didn't, since he came here. Yusuke is trying to make up for them, not dwell on them. ]

Yes, Futaba. I have been doing a lot of thinking, and talking. I have been so caught up in my own whirlwind of everything that I hurt you. I know I did, and I am sorry. I cannot help the way I feel or don't feel any more than you can, but I can pay attention. I just...didn't. I neglected your feelings and breezed past you, and you are not the first to fall victim to my carelessness.

[ ...he'll talk to Brendan later. If he'll even listen. ]

You are important to me, no matter who feels what. I want to be a better friend.
lempereur: (feeling overheated)

[personal profile] lempereur 2017-08-15 06:47 am (UTC)(link)
You brought it up once, and it was not subtle. That should have been enough for me to realize I needed to be more careful.

[ Yusuke moves over to have a seat on the couch, pulling one knee up towards his chest to lay his head on, and letting the other one dangle off. ]

He told me I was being self-centered. It isn't a lie. I have been trying to handle everything on my own, just like back then, before the Thieves.
lempereur: (masquerade)

[personal profile] lempereur 2017-08-15 06:17 pm (UTC)(link)
I could have told you about him more tactfully.

[ Yusuke watches carefully, letting his hair fall in front of his face as he listens to Futaba echo his feelings back at him. ]

Thank you for understanding. My intentions were always good, but I have work to do. I know that. People have offered to help shoulder my burden and I have turned them away. You, however, refuse to be told no, so I didn't try.
lempereur: (ain't no party in a sad sad city)

[personal profile] lempereur 2017-08-16 03:27 am (UTC)(link)
[ It is true...but this seems a lot more serious than rearranging figurines or not properly appreciating his animal puns. ]

Yuri said the same thing, that night with Adachi...

[ And last night, before Yusuke fell asleep nestled comfortably in the crook of his neck, he said that he was afraid, and angry. Even if he doesn't blame Yusuke for it, the artist knows that he has to do something about it. ]

I would not know where to start. I don't imagine asking politely to leave would get me anywhere.
lempereur: (Because it's working.)

OH WELL

[personal profile] lempereur 2017-08-16 05:07 am (UTC)(link)
I must have fallen asleep before then.

[ Is it bad to tell her he spent the night there? He's really bad at this. ]

Can you really promise that? I think if anyone can do it, it would be you, but...there is a strong possibility of retaliation, if I even try. Even after Adachi was caught talking, Dooku made sure he was still on board.

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